The Toddler

True Story:

Before I tell said true story I must say PRAISE YOU JESUS.
Now... said true story...

Sitting at the kitchen table I hear lil' M doing one of her favorite things.  Pulling cookie sheets out of the lower cabinets -- dropping them on the floor.  Clang. clang.  I don't think anything of it.  I don't look over.  She is only 9 feet away and the cookie sheets can't break.  Then I hear it again (probably only 20 seconds later).  But I realize it isn't a clang, its a cling.  And evvvvveryone knows cookies sheets only clang, not cling.  My attention is caught.  I look over.  I stop breathing.  

Cookie sheets don't cling.  But 6-inch chef's knives do!  Sweet Lord have MERCY!  My child is waiving a big knife like she is Peter Pan.  I run to her screaming her name and NO NO NO NO!! The 2 seconds it takes me to run the 9 feet to her felt like an hour.  A whole dissertation of "How not to watch your child die" was recited in my head as I made the 200 mile trek to reach her.  During my journey I watch her grab the blade with her other hand as she looks at me smiling with sheer delight.

I arrive at her side and am only able to grab the un-sworded hand as she valiantly treats me as the villainous beast dragon -- waiving her sword at my knees.   Luckily my resident man hero shows up and grabs the knife.  M is giggling and wants her new shiny toy back.  I scoop her up.  Inspect her.  Not a single cut or scratch.  PRAISE JESUS.  I fall back on the kitchen floor and try to resume breathing and take a second to decide if I am going to sob or not.  I decide that breathing is more important than sobbing.  

M's giggles are morphing into shrieks of outrage that her game of Peter Pan has come to an end.  Daddy & Mommy discuss how thankful we are and how we must now be aware that little fingers can reach over countertops.  

We laugh now at this story, but constantly pray that God will give us wisdom to raise and protect our daughter and that he will intercede when we fail.


  1. oh my goodness! i almost stopped breathing reading this story too! glad she is OK but i am slowly starting to know what you mean! Austin is getting into everything these days!

    Sandy a la Mode

  2. I had to laugh a little (only because I knew she was okay) because, mama, I have been there! Sully snatched up a similarly sized knife at about M and Arlo's age. The only reason Arlo hasn't almost sliced himself yet is because I've been taught by the biggest that little hands reach things you never could have imagined!

  3. Oh my gosh! i can't imagine the horror... WOW.

  4. This would have had me freaking out! So glad you got to her in time... we don't need a Captain Hook in the family. ;)
    Emily at Amazing Grapes

  5. This might be a duplicate comment, but I basically agree with everything you said.

  6. Damn! Thank God she's alright. I stopped breathinng while reading. I think you're a terrific writer, I felt like I was there in the kitchen with you.

  7. OH WOW. Freaking out with you while reading through this. That last sentence - amen!

  8. Dangerous but the important is that nothing happened :)
    Kate @ bykoket

  9. Oh goodness. Praise Jesus, indeed!! That must have been so scary! I can't imagine!


  10. Sometimes I think they just enjoy seeing us freak out. My 9-month-old nearly choked (and then vomited for the first time) after my inattention allowed her to eat a leaf. I was horrified, but she was fine.

    Glad M (and you) made it through intact!

  11. Oh my goodness. Just found your blog & I already feel like I know you after this post! So traumatic! I have a 3 month old, so I'm taking notes on how to child proof your house. I think I'll start in the kitchen! ha!

  12. so one time, my oldest {2 at the time} got into a bathtub, managed to plug the drain and turn it on. I thought he was taking a nap, when I went to check the monitor saw it was off, turned it on, saw little man was missing, went on a hunt, discovered running water sound, burst into bathroom to find 2 year old in tub water up to his chest. PRAISE JESUS, it was cold water only and he did not drown. I hyperventilated when it was all said and done, legit.


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